"What would it take to end domestic and sexual violence in Vermont?"

Making a Difference in your Neighborhood

The following is an excerpt is adapted from the Family Violence Prevention Fund's "Prevention Toolbox" - find the full text at www.endabuse.org. They also have great materials that can be ordered (videos, kits, posters, stickers etc). Of course you can also make your own materials, ask your local domestic violence program for posters and brochures, and borrow books and videos from libraries.  

Activate Your Neighborhood
Like you, most people feel that domestic and sexual violence is a terrible problem, and they want to do something to help. It can seem overwhelming, though, and most people don't know how to get involved.

The good news is, there are steps each and every one of us can take to help stop domestic and sexual violence in our neighborhoods.

Make Your Community a Place that Promotes Zero-Tolerance to Domestic and Sexual Violence

There are many ways you can help raise awareness about domestic and sexual violence in your neighborhood and communicate to others that violence is never acceptable or excusable, and let victims know that they are not alone. Here are some ideas:

·        Something as simple as a bumper sticker can have a greater impact on domestic and sexual violence than you might think.

Carol put a "There's No Excuse for Domestic Violence" bumper sticker on her car and drove to work every day. One day, a woman who works in her building told her that she had just left her husband. She had seen the bumper sticker on Carol's car every day when she went to work for the past year, and knowing that others around her were taking a stand helped give her the courage to leave her husband for good.

·        Visit places in your community where women may spend time – gyms, supermarkets, post offices, libraries - and ask them to display posters and other awareness materials about domestic and sexual violence and where to go for help.

·         Safety Cards can be handed to a woman discreetly or left in restrooms where women can take them anonymously. They outline simple but critical ways women can protect themselves and their children from sexual violence and abuse, and include local resources for help.

Cheryl worked at Einstein hospital in Philadelphia. She wanted to help women facing domestic violence, so she placed a stack of safety cards in the employee lounge. Days went by and the pile went untouched. One day, she moved the cards to the women's restroom, thinking more women might take the card if they could do so in private. She was right - the cards went like hotcakes.

·        House Signs: This bright blue house sign will let people know there's NO ROOM for domestic violence in your neighborhood! Place it in your window, on telephone poles in the neighborhood and in other high-visibility locations. Encourage your neighbors to put them up as well. You can pass them out at Neighborhood Watch meetings, or any other community setting where neighbors get together. Declare that you want your block to be a "Domestic Violence Free-Zone!" or create your own  “Rape-Free Zone” sign.

·        Donate Money to domestic and sexual violence programs in your area to make sure survivors will have the support they need in their community. Be creative! Throw yourself a birthday party and ask your friends, neighbors and co-workers to write checks to a local domestic and sexual violence program in the amount they would otherwise have spent on a gift for you.

·        Donate other resources. Call your local program and ask what they need. Some programs are very grateful for in-kind donations (office supplies, food or household items for survivors, donated services …). Some neighborhoods have done in-kind donations drives or have organized into volunteer groups that donate their time and expertise to domestic and sexual violence organizations (painting the shelter, making quilts for survivors, clothes or toy drives, organizational development, …)

Organize a Book or Video Discussion
Invite a group of neighbors or friends to all read a book or watch a video. You can meet and discuss the book or video, which helps to raise awareness and gets people involved in the issues. Find attached a list of general interest books and videos, as well as some suggested discussion points. For more specialized books or videos contact your local program or the VT Network Against Domestic and Sexual Violence.

What Towns Can Do to Help

End Domestic and Sexual Violence in Vermont

Support Domestic Violence and Sexual Violence Services

·        Reduce or cancel property taxes for the local domestic/sexual violence program

·        Support them in finding affordable, suitable space for shelter or offices

·        Allocate annual town funding to the local DV/SV program. Attend your local town meeting and speak out for DV/SV services. Many towns provide small amounts of funding to the local shelter. Make sure this is not cut and respond to any negative statements that may be made about domestic and sexual violence victims or services.

Take a Stance/Raise Awareness

·        Get the issue of DV/SV on the agenda of the town meeting, city council meetings etc (get annual stats of DV/SV cases for your community and publicize them to raise awareness

·        Mayor and city council/town select board could pass resolutions to support domestic or sexual violence victims (e.g. declare October/March Domestic Violence/Sexual Violence awareness months)

·        Use the town hall or other public places to display DV/SV awareness and education material (ask your local program to recommend materials)

·        Support local DV/SV awareness events

·        Educate all city/town employees on DV/SV, and make victim support services available to them. Modify the town’s personnel policies to encourage victim support and perpetrator accountability

Improve Media Coverage

Help improve the way the media covers incidents of domestic and sexual violence in your community. Media coverage can have a tremendous impact, either positive or negative. While coverage has improved in recent years, some problems still remain. When someone is injured or killed in a domestic or sexual violence situation, local TV and newspaper reporters often cover the incident as if it were an isolated event. They rarely take the opportunity to put it in a broader context, by citing local or national statistics about how common this crime is, how abusers use a series of strategies to control their partner over a long period of time, or by letting people know how they can help put a stop to it.

Reporters might make excuses for the perpetrator's behavior, saying he had been depressed over losing his job, or that he had been drinking heavily. They might attribute the motive to "jealousy" over a new boyfriend, without saying that irrational jealousy is a typical symptom in domestic violence relationships, and that the woman is not at fault. Other poor word choices that reporters sometimes use include describing the relationship as "turbulent" or "with ups and downs," or calling the incident a "domestic dispute" or "quarrel." They may describe a sexual assault as a “he said, she said” or only address cases where the victim is assaulted by a stranger ignoring the reality that most victims know their perpetrator in some way.  These choices downplay the seriousness of the crime and can feed into widely believed misinformation about the reality of sexual and domestic violence.

If a story appears in your local media that you object to, write a letter to the editor, station manager or reporter. Tell them what you objected to, and that a more effective story would include telling readers or viewers what they can do to stay safe, and what they can do to help. This could include:

• publicizing the National Domestic Violence Hotline number (1-800-799-SAFE); or the 24 hour Rape Crisis hotline (1-800-489-7273).

• listing tips on how to get out of an abusive relationship or what to do if you have been sexually assaulted

• offering some information from the local program against domestic and sexual violence on the realities of sexual or domestic violence and dispelling misinformation.

• letting their audience know that they can call 1-800-END-ABUSE or 1-800-489-7273 for information on how to help stop domestic violence.

Encourage your local media to hold the perpetrators accountable, rather than blaming the victims.